the confusion of a gathering

i'm pretty sure i draw awesome birds,
but none of this matters right now.

what really matters is that everybody
drinks too much,
and at the same time not enough
at all.

i even saw my dad drunk this weekend,
more hammered than i can ever remember.
the sad thing,
or funny thing,
is that i was too drunk
to even remember.

then chris was kicked out
for flinging meatballs at the ceiling.
this made lauren cry.

i never witnessed a thing
because
i was somewhere on the backporch
smoking cigarettes with steve.

and whats really weird
is that i haven't smoked a cigarette
with anyone
in six months
and twentyone days.